2014년 12월 6일 토요일

Final draft

Is Animal Testing Necessary?



  Many people use a lot of products in daily life. For example, you use some cosmetics for your dating. And If you catch a cold because you stay at home and turn on the air conditioner, you have medicine that the doctor prescribed. Also, you have a meal when you are hungry. Most people use products without a doubt because they believe that products are safe. So, What kind of process do these products go through in order to ensure these products are safe? They are tested through animal testing! Many companies experiment on animals to make safe products. But, use of animal in experiments causes controversy. There are some people who argue that animal testing is most effective and accurate method to develop medicine. On the other hands, there are some people who argue that we should not use animals on experiments because animal testing has cruelty and unreliable method. In such controversy, It seems like facts that we should not experiment on animal.

   Animal testing is any experiment using living animals in order to develop for scientific aim such as medicine, food or cosmetics. The various animals - from a protozoan to mammal - are used commonly in animal testing. In 2012, animals that were used for scientific experiment are approximately 500,000,0000 each year in the world. The origin of animal testing trace back to the ancient Greece. Hippocrates(BC460?~BC377?) explained reproduction and heredity through animal dissection. And Aristoteles(BC384~BC322) also developed anatomy and embryology through observing animal. Moreover, Claudios Galenos(129~199) who was a roman physician in a second century is famous because he investigated fact about brain nerves, muscle, bone and heart, dissecting animals like monkey, pigs and goats. Like this, Study of animal dissection was important groundwork in medical areas. Although animal testing has led to advances in medical science, why people raise their voice against animal testing? Recently, animals experimentation video reveals that experimental animals that cannot move at all in plastic machines suffer from drugs tests. Although It is difficult to stop animal testing completely because Animal testing's purpose and form are various as the long history, people argue that animal testing should stop.
 
   First of all, animal testing have cruelty and hurts experimental animals. Some people believe that experimental animals died without pain during testing. But, If we see animal testing process, we cannot say it. The animal testing process shows that seriousness and cruelty of animal experiments. For example, New England Anti-Vivisection Society explain about cruelty of animal testing. It says that animals come in for tests that include everything from doing new drug testing to infecting with diseases, making brain damage, giving brain electric shock, burning skin, giving a toxic substance, blinding, and other agonizing and painful procedures. New England Anti-Vivisection Society stated that Anesthetization, euthanasia and intubation are also the common process that need considerable training and skill. When experiments improperly do, these processes make animal get extreme suffering and discomfort. Like this, Many experimental animals suffer from physical distress during testing. Besides, They suffer from mental anguish. For example, New England Anti-Vivisection Society shows mental pain of experimental animals. A lot of animal testers use restraining devices that keep the animals from moving. Also, animals get extreme stress because of day-to-day lab life. They live their lives in desolate cages that make animals unable to express natural behaviors. Most of them cannot feel fresh air and sunshine but concrete and foul air. They show abnormal behavior because of poor environment. These animal experiments show that laboratory animals don't be respected. The rights of animals, as well as human rights should be respected. So, Most animals should not suffer from not only mental anguish but also physical distress during testing anymore because all of the animals are living things and should be respected.
 
   Next, Animal testing doesn't work. Some people think that animal testing is most accurate and reliable method because animals share many genes with humans. However, animals are not little human. They can be a human and human also can be an animal. So, they cannot get human diseases. We can know the fact that animals cannot get human diseases through Animal Aid that is a British animal rights organization. Chimpanzees share more than 98% of human DNA. But, they don’t be troubled with deadly forms of AIDS, hepatitis B or malaria that kills millions of humans every year. So, They can make poor data because animal experimenting cannot reflect a human condition perfectly. For example, The National Anti-Vivisection Society explain about Thalidomide. Thalidomide is used in the 1950s as a sedative. It is a medicine which give pregnant women in order to cure morning sickness. Thalidomide was safe when it was tested in animals, but If she takes thalidomide when woman was pregnant, It causes birth defects in over 10,000 children. Moreover, The National Anti-Vivisection Society describe a penicillin. It was not appropriate for curing infected rabbits and was poisonous to guinea pigs. However, It is effective and appropriate for curing bacterial infections in most humans. The animal experiments often show unreliable and inaccurate results. If the use of animals on experiment continues, It can be a disaster to human because unreliable and inaccurate data can hurt a lot of people. So If the real purpose of experiments is finding treatment for many diseases and curing the human, we should not test on animals because animal experiment doesn't work.
 
   Finally, There are various alternatives to animal testing. The alternatives that experts find are more effective and accurate method rather than animal testing. Also, they have a lot of good points. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals explain alternatives to animal testing that include that Vitro Testing using human tissues and cells, computer-modeling system and research with human volunteers. For example, Harvard’s Wyss Institute has developed “organs-on-chips” which contain human cells that grow in a state-of-the-art system in order to imitate the structure and function of internal organ of a human body. The chips can be used instead of animals testing that makes animals painful and It has been shown to copy human physiology, illness, and predict drug responses more reliably than rough animal testers do. These alternatives make results that are relevant to human bodies. Also, non-animal testing has a lot of benefits. National Anti-Vivisection Society say that Non-animal tests are more cost-effective and pragmatic. The traditional animal testing can take five years per and require millions of dollars while non-animal testing can experiment hundreds of chemicals in a week with a slight cost. In sum, non-animal testing is more cost-effective and reliable while, animal experiments are unreliable and cruel. If we have more effective method, we don't have to experiment on animals.
 
   Some people can argue that animal testing is most accurate method because humans share most genes with mammals. However, opponent's opinion is overlooking that animal testing cannot help people find human diseases because animals never reflect human bodies perfectly. So, medicine that is effective in animals may be ineffective in human bodies. Even, animal experiments lead to a serious problem to human health. National Anti-Vivisection Society says that monkeys are cured with a therapeutic antibody (anti-CD28 monoclonal antibody TGN1412) but, they didn’t anticipate the latent fatal immune response that was caused in humans. Also, according to Animal Aid It’s common that the rate of success for predicting harmful adverse effect from animal testing is 5-25%. So, animal testing is not accurate and reliable method because although they share a lot of genes with humans, animals testing can make poor data that have a bad effect on human beings. 
   Also, someone can say that It is very dangerous for humans to give a medicine that are not tested on animals directly. But It is not important because there are various alternative to animal testing. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals explain advanced computer Modeling. It shows that these models can accurately predict drug response of human organs and replace using animals in new drug testing and toxicity experiment. We don't argue that we should give medicine to human without any testing such as animal testing. We can ensure that these products are safe through various alternatives that are more effective rather than animal testing.
 
   A responsible society should not allow experimenters to test using animals. First, animal testing is cruel and makes experimental animals suffer from severe pain. Next, animal testing doesn't work because animals never can reflect human bodies perfectly. Finally, There are various alternatives that are more reliable and effective rather than animal testing.
   A controversy about animal testing occurs when the animal experiment video show that many animals suffer from this testing. It is important for not only human beings but also animals to stop the animal testing because animals are living things and should be respected. So, Stopping animal testing is best solution because animal testing can not only hurt experimental animals but also make poor data that hurt people. The Director of the National Institutes of Health, Dr. Francis Collins, recognized that “using animal in laboratory for medical advance and target validation is taking a huge amount of time, costly and may not accurately predict the efficacy of a drug.” If we don't stop the animal testing that cause a serious problem to human health because people believe that the animal experiment is effective way, we someday suffer from the consequence of animal testing. Who will prevent this situation? It will be you and me. So, In order to prevent this situation, It is necessary to stop animal testing.





 
References
 
1. New England Anti-Vivisection Society. (n.d.). Harm and Suffering. Retrieved from http://www.neavs.org/research/harm-suffering
 
2. Animal Aid. (n.d.). Do animal experiments work?. Retrieved from http://www.animalaid.org.uk/h/n/YOUTH/experiments//1873//
 
3. The National Anti-Vivisection Society. (n.d.) The Failure of the Animal Model. Retrieved from http://www.navs.org/science/failure-of-the-animal-model
 
4. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. (n.d.) Alternatives to Animal Testing. Retrieved from http://www.peta.org/issues/animals-used-for-experimentation/alternatives-animal-testing/
 
5. Harvard’s Wyss Institute. (Nov 7, 2012). Wyss Institute Models a Human Disease in an Organ-on-a-Chip. Retrieved from http://wyss.harvard.edu/viewpressrelease/99
 
6. National Anti-Vivisection Society. (n.d.) Alternatives In Testing. Retrieved from http://www.neavs.org/alternatives/in-testing
 
7. Francis S. Collins. (n.d.). Reengineering Translational Science: The Time Is Right. Retrived from http://stm.sciencemag.org/content/3/90/90cm17.full


2014년 12월 3일 수요일

Peer Review for 20709박대경

Grade
According to the rubric above, what grade would you give this essay? Why?
3점. refutation도 없고 conclusion도 없다.
How does this essay need to improve to get a better grade?
형식에 맞게 쓰면 좋을 듯.

Thesis
What is the thesis?
 Even though the anonymity on the Internet is important, it should not be guaranteed because of its harmful aspects.

Is the thesis clear and debatable?
Yes

If you (The reviewer) wrote this essay, how would you have written the thesis?
인터넷 실명제의 단점이 장점보다 더 큰 영향을 끼친다.

Any other thoughts?
없음

Classical Argument
Can you easily identify the 5 parts of the classical argument? If no, what parts are missing?
 4문단으로 되있으며 conclusion부분과 refutation 부분이 없는 듯 하다.

Does the introduction catch your attention? Does it comfortably lead to the thesis?
Can you imagine a day without the internet? 이라는 질문이 있는데 독자입장에서는 이러한 질문이 주제와 관련 없다는 생각을 하게 됨.

Does the narration give all the necessary background information to understand the topic?
인터넷 실명제의 배경지식 보다는 실례를 중심으로 설명한 것 같다.

Does the confirmation adequately support the thesis?
아니요. 사람들을 설득하기에는 증거가 너무 부족한 것 같다.

Does the refutation and concession address a realistic counterpoint? Does it adequately dispute the counterpoint, or respond in a reasonable manner?
refutation 부분이 없음.

Does the conclusion summarize the article and address the larger significance of the thesis?
conclusion 부분이 없음.

What suggestions do you have for improving the classical argument structure?
confirmation부분을 더 추가하고 narration과 refutation부분을 쓰세요.

Persuasion
When you started reading the essay, did you agree or disagree with the thesis?
 disagree

When you finished the essay, did you agree or disagree with the thesis?
disagree

If your mind changed, why? What parts of the essay were persuasive?
바뀌지 않았음. 왜냐하면 익명성을 막아버리면 자신의 의견을 자유롭게 표현할 수 없는데 그 부분에 대한 반박도 없고 주장하는 부분이 너무 약하기 때문이다.

How could the author enhance the persuasive parts of their essay?
자신의 주장을 좀 더 다양한 근거를 들어 말해야 할 것 같고, 반박부분에서 표현의 자유 침해와 같은 주장을 반박해야 할 것같다. 그리고 conclusion 부분을 써야할 듯.

Research
Is the author using research effectively?
no.

Is the research from appropriate sources?
Yes

Are the sources obvious?
yes

Are the pieces of evidence relevant to the thesis or essay?
관련이 있으나 좀 더 많은 research를 했으면 좋겠음.

Are there any parts of the essay that need evidence to support the claims?
confirmation부분에 의견 한가지가 아니라 여러가지 의견을 제시하고 그에 맞는 근거 자료를 써야할 것같다.

Peer Review for 20708김효정

Grade
According to the rubric above, what grade would you give this essay? Why?
4점. 구성과 내용은 좋았으나 아직 문법적인 요소가 다듬어지지 않은것 같기 때문이다.

How does this essay need to improve to get a better grade?
글을 읽기 쉽게 다듬어 주면 좋을듯! 그 단락이 너무 많아서 뭐가 narration 이고 confirmation인지 구분이 안감.

Thesis
What is the thesis?
The lie detector is not accurate to use in the court as the evidence.

Is the thesis clear and debatable?
Yes

If you (The reviewer) wrote this essay, how would you have written the thesis?
거짓말 탐지기는 진실여부를 확인하기에 신뢰할 수 없는 방법이다.

Any other thoughts?
없음

Classical Argument
Can you easily identify the 5 parts of the classical argument? If no, what parts are missing?
Yes

Does the introduction catch your attention? Does it comfortably lead to the thesis?
독자에게 질문을 하면서 흥미를 끄는 것 같다. 하지만 introduction 짧은 것 같아서 아쉽다. 질문 뿐만 아니라 자신의 경험을 더 하면 더 재밌을 것 같다는 생각을 함.

Does the narration give all the necessary background information to understand the topic?
Narration이 주제를 이해하기에 적절한 설명을 첨가함.

Does the confirmation adequately support the thesis?
다양한 증거를 기본으로 주장을 잘 펼친것 같다. 환경이 거짓말을 측정하는데 장애물이 될수도 있다는 주장에서 피실험자에게 편안하고 안정된 공간에서 측정하면 되지 않을까? 라는 의문이 생겼다.

Does the refutation and concession address a realistic counterpoint? Does it adequately dispute the counterpoint, or respond in a reasonable manner?
3가지의 반박근거를 이용해서 재반박을 할 수 없게 만든 것같다.

Does the conclusion summarize the article and address the larger significance of the thesis?
NO. 마지막 부분이 독자에게 강한 인상을 주기에 너무 짧은듯.

What suggestions do you have for improving the classical argument structure?
마지막 conclusion 부분에 전문가의 말을 인용해서 독자에게 강한 인상을  심어주면 좋을듯.

Persuasion
When you started reading the essay, did you agree or disagree with the thesis? 
동의

When you finished the essay, did you agree or disagree with the thesis?
계속 동의

If your mind changed, why? What parts of the essay were persuasive?
마지막에 있는 refutaion에 3가지 근거를 들어 반박하는 부분이 가장 설득력 있었음.

How could the author enhance the persuasive parts of their essay?
딱히 없는 듯

Research
Is the author using research effectively?
다양한 근거를 바탕으로 글을 효과적으로 작성함.

Is the research from appropriate sources?
위키피디아나 신뢰도가 떨어지는 사이트가 아니라 적절한 사이트에서 찾음.

Are the sources obvious?


Are the pieces of evidence relevant to the thesis or essay?
통계자료나 실험 등이 에세이 주제에 적합함.

Are there any parts of the essay that need evidence to support the claims?
없음.

2014년 11월 16일 일요일

Second Draft

   Many people use a lot of products in daily life. For example, you use some cosmetics for your dating. And If you catch a cold because you stay at home and turn on the air conditioner, you have medicine that the doctor prescribed. Also, you have a meal when you are hungry. Most people use products without a doubt because they believe that products are safe. So, What kind of process do these products go through in order to ensure these products are safe? They are tested through animal testing! Many companies experiment on animals to make safe products. But, use of animal in experiments causes controversy. There are some people who argue that animal testing is most effective and accurate method to develop medicine. On the other hands, there are some people who argue that we should not use animals on experiments because animal testing has cruelty and unreliable method. In such controversy, It seems like facts that we should not experiment on animal.

   Animal testing is any experiment using living animals in order to develop for scientific aim such as medicine, food or cosmetics. The various animals - from a protozoan to mammal - are used commonly in animal testing. In 2012, animals that were used for scientific experiment are approximately 500,000,0000 each year in the world. The origin of animal testing trace back to the ancient Greece. Hippocrates(BC460?~BC377?) explained reproduction and heredity through animal dissection. And Aristoteles(BC384~BC322) also developed anatomy and embryology through observing animal. Moreover, Claudios Galenos(129~199) who was a roman physician in a second century is famous because he investigated fact about brain nerves, muscle, bone and heart, dissecting animals like monkey, pigs and goats. Like this, Study of animal dissection was important groundwork in medical areas. Although animal testing has led to advances in medical science, why people raise their voice against animal testing? Recently, animals experimentation video reveals that experimental animals that cannot move at all in plastic machines suffer from drugs tests. Although It is difficult to stop animal testing completely because Animal testing's purpose and form are various as the long history, people argue that animal testing should stop.
 
   First of all, animal testing have cruelty and hurts experimental animals. Some people believe that experimental animals died without pain during testing. But, If we see animal testing process, we cannot say it. The animal testing process shows that seriousness and cruelty of animal experiments. For example, New England Anti-Vivisection Society explain about cruelty of animal testing. It says that animals come in for tests that include everything from doing new drug testing to infecting with diseases, making brain damage, giving brain electric shock, burning skin, giving a toxic substance, blinding, and other agonizing and painful procedures. New England Anti-Vivisection Society stated that Anesthetization, euthanasia and intubation are also common process that need considerable training and skill. When experiments improperly do, these processes make animal get extreme suffering and discomfort. Like this, Many experimental animals suffer from physical distress during testing. Besides, They suffer from mental anguish. For example, New England Anti-Vivisection Society shows mental pain of experimental animals. A lot of animal testers use restraining devices that keep the animals from moving. Also, animals get extreme stress because of day-to-day lab life. They lives their lives in desolate cages which make animals unable to express natural behaviors. Most of them cannot feel fresh air and sunshine but concrete and foul air. They shows abnormal behavior because of poor environment. These animal experiments show that laboratory animals don't be respected. The rights of animals as well as human rights should be respected. So, Most animals should not suffer from not only mental anguish but also physical distress during testing anymore because all of animals are living things and should be respected.
 
   Next, Animal testing doesn't work. Some people think that animal testing is most accurate and reliable method because animals share many genes with humans. However, animals are not little human. They can be a human and human also can be an animal. So, they cannot get human diseases. we can know the fact that animals cannot get human diseases through Animal Aid that is a british animal rights organization. Chimpanzees share more than 98% of human DNA. But, they don’t be troubled with deadly forms of AIDS, hepatitis B or malaria that kills millions of humans every year. So, They can make poor data because animal experimenting cannot reflect a human condition perfectly. For example, The National Anti-Vivisection Society explain about Thalidomide. Thalidomide is used in the 1950s as a sedative. It is a medicine which give pregnant women in order to cure morning sickness. Thalidomide was safe when tested in animals, but If she take thalidomide when woman was pregnant, It causes birth defects in over 10,000 children. Moreover, The National Anti-Vivisection Society describe a penicillin. It was not appropriate for curing infected rabbits and was poisonous to guinea pigs. However, It is effective and appropriate for curing bacterial infections in most humans. The animal experiments often show unreliable and inaccurate results. If the use of animals on experiment continues, It can be a disaster to human because unreliable and inaccurate data can hurt a lot of people. So If the real purpose of experiments is finding treatment for many diseases and curing the human, we should not test on animals because animal experiment doesn't work.
 
   Finally, There are various alternatives to animal testing. Nowadays, Many experts have stated to find alternatives that are appropriate to human because animal testing is cruel and unreliable.The alternatives that experts find are now more effective and accurate method rather than animal testing. Also, they have a lot of good points. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals explain alternatives to animal testing that include that Vitro Testing using human tissues and cells, computer-modeling system and research with human volunteers. For example, Harvard’s Wyss Institute has developed “organs-on-chips” which contain human cells that grow in a state-of-the-art system in order to imitate the structure and function of internal organ of a human body. The chips can be used instead of animals testing that makes animals painful and It has been shown to copy human physiology, illness, and predict drug responses more reliably than rough animal testers do. These alternatives make results that are relevant to human bodies. Also, non-animal testing has a lot of benefits. National Anti-Vivisection Society say that Non-animal tests are more cost-effective and pragmatic. The traditional animal testing can take five years per and require millions of dollars, while non-animal testing can experiment hundreds of chemicals in a week with a slight cost. In sum, non-animal testing is more cost-effective and reliable while, animal experiments are unreliable and cruel. If we have more effective method, we don't have to experiment on animals.
 
   Some people can argue that animal testing is most accurate method because humans share most genes with mammals. However, opponent's opinion is overlooking that animal testing cannot help people find human diseases because animals never reflect human bodies perfectly. So, medicine that is effective in animals may be ineffective in human bodies. Even, animal experiments lead to a serious problem to human health. National Anti-Vivisection Society says that monkeys are cured with a therapeutic antibody (anti-CD28 monoclonal antibody TGN1412) but, they didn’t anticipate the latent fatal immune response that was caused in humans. Also, according to anima Animal Aid It’s common that the rate of success for predicting harmful adverse effect from animal testing is 5-25%. So, animal testing is not accurate and reliable method because although they share a lot of genes with humans, animals testing can make poor data that have a bad effect on human beings. 
   Also, someone can say that It is very dangerous for humans to give a medicine that are not tested on animals directly. But It is not important because there are various alternative to animal testing. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals explain advanced computer Modeling. It shows that these models can accurately predict drug response of human organs and replace using animals in new drug testing and toxicity experiment. We don't argue that we should give medicine to human without any testing such as animal testing. We can ensure that these products are safe through various alternatives that are more effective rather than animal testing.
 
   A responsible society should not allow experimenters to test using animals. First, animal testing is cruel and makes experimental animals suffer from severe pain. Next, animal testing doesn't work because animals never can reflect human bodies perfectly. Finally, There are various alternatives that are more reliable and effective rather than animal testing.
   A controversy about animal testing occurs when the animal experiment video show that many animals suffer from this testing. It is important for not only human beings but also animals to stop the animal testing because animals are living things and should be respected. So, Stopping animal testing is best solution because animal testing can not only hurt experimental animals but also make poor data that hurt people. The Director of the National Institutes of Health, Dr. Francis Collins, recognized that “using animal in laboratory for medical advance and target validation is taking a huge amount of time, costly and may not accurately predict the efficacy of a drug.” If we don't stop the animal testing that cause a serious problem to human health because people believe that the animal experiment is effective way, we someday suffer from the consequence of animal testing. Who will prevent this situation? It will be you and me. So, In order to prevent this situation, It is necessary to stop animal testing. 

Research 7 : Wyss Institute Models a Human Disease in an Organ-on-a-Chip

Source:
Wyss Institute Models a Human Disease in an Organ-on-a-Chip
http://wyss.harvard.edu/viewpressrelease/99


My Topic:
we should not experiment on animals


 What I hope to learn from this source:
I want to find reliable alternatives to animal testing.

Notes:

1. Major pharmaceutical companies spend a lot of time and a huge amount of money on cell cultures and animal testing to develop new drugs," but these methods often fail to predict the effects of these agents when they reach humans."
2. The study offers further proof-of-concept that human "organs-on-chips" hold tremendous potential to replace traditional approaches to drug discovery and development.
3. Organs-on-a-chip represents a new approach to model the structure, biology, and function of human organs, as evidenced by the complex breathing action of this engineered lung
4. I think that It is a great alternatives to animal testing.

 
Final Thoughts:
Through this sources, I can make thrid reason in confirmation more strong and reliable. And I want to more practical alternatives.

Research 6 : Reengineering Translational Science: The Time Is Right

Source:
Reengineering Translational Science: The Time Is Right
http://stm.sciencemag.org/content/3/90/90cm17.full


My Topic:
we should not experiment on animals


 What I hope to learn from this source:
I want to find expert's saying about animal testing.

Notes:

1. The use of animal models for therapeutic development and target validation is time consuming, costly, and may not accurately predict efficacy in humans
2. Dr. Francis Collins, Science Translational Medicine, “Reengineering Translational Science: The Time is Right,”
3. It can make my essay more strong and compelling.
 

 
Final Thoughts:
Through this sources, I make memorable part in my conclusion. I think that It makes part of conclusion more compelling.

Self Evaluation


First, what score do you think you deserve? Write a brief justification.
-  I think I deserve 2 points because I included all of the 5 classical argument elements. Also, I have strong research to make my essay strong. 

Next, let's decide what did you do well, and what could you do better?

1) Narration, I tried to put information about history of animal testing. It helps people understand my essay.

2) At fist, I wrote my essay separately. If I don't make paragraphs connected to each other, It is difficult for people to read my eassay. So I tried to connect my essay to each other.
 
Please recall the 5 parts of the classical argument. Which part of the classical argument did you use the best? Which part could be improved?
1) Narration. I put information about history of animal testing, which helps people understand animal testing better.

 2) Confirmation. I think I have to paraphrase information in order to make people understand better.
 
 

Last, what's your strategy for your next draft? Where will you focus your attention to make the second draft stronger?

- I will paraphrase information in order to help people read my essay. And I will not plagiarize.

2014년 10월 26일 일요일

My First Draft


  
  Many people use a lot of products in daily life. For example, you use some cosmetics for your dating. And If you catch a cold because you stay at home and turn on an air conditioner, you have medicine that doctor prescribed. Also, you have a meal when you are hungry. Most people use products without doubt because they believe that products are safe. So, What kind of process do these products go through in order to ensure these products are safe? They are tested through animal testing! Many companies experiment on animals to make safe products. But, use of animal in experiments cause controversy. There are some people who argue that animal testing is most effective and accurate method to develop medicine. On the other hands, there are some people who argue that we should not use animals on experiments because animal testing has cruelty and unreliable method. In such controversy, It seems like facts that we should not experiment on animal.
  
  Animal testing is any experiment using living animals in order to develop for scientific aim such as medicine, food or cosmetics. The various animals - from a protozoan to mammal - are used commonly in animal testing. In 2012, animals that are used for scientific experiment are approximately 500,000,0000 each year in the world. The origin of animal testing trace back to the ancient Greece. Hippocrates(BC460?~BC377?) explained reproduction and heredity through animal dissection. And Aristoteles(BC384~BC322) also developed anatomy and embryology through observing animal. Moreover, Claudios Galenos(129~199) who was roman physician in second century is famous because he investigated fact about brain nerves, muscle, bone and heart ,dissecting animals like monkey, pigs and goats. Like this, Study of animal dissection was important groundwork in medical areas. Although animal testing has led to advances in medical science, why people raise their voice against animal testing? Recently, animals experimentation video reveals that experimental animals that cannot move at all in plastic machines suffer from drugs tests. Although It is difficult to stop animal testing completely because Animal testing's purpose and form is various as the long history, people argue that animal testing should stop.
 
  First of all, animal testing reveals cruelty and hurts experimental animals. Some people believe that experimental animals died without pain during testing. But, If we see animal testing process, we cannot say it. The animal testing process shows that seriousness and cruelty of animal experiments. For example, In research and testing, animals are subjected to experiments that can include everything from testing new drugs to infecting with diseases, poisoning for toxicity testing, burning skin, causing brain damage, implanting electrodes into the brain, maiming, blinding, and other painful and invasive procedures. Another example is that Anesthetization, intubation, and euthanasia are also common lab procedures which require extensive training and skill. When improperly performed, these procedures cause extreme pain and discomfort. Like this, Many experimental animals suffer from physical distress during testing. Besides, They suffer from mental anguish. For example, Many animal experiments utilize restraining devices, designed to prevent an animal from moving. Also, Animals in labs suffer severe stress from day-to-day laboratory life. They spend their lives in barren cages, unable to make choices or express natural behaviors. Most never experience fresh air or sunshine, only bars and concrete. They show abnormal behavior because of poor environment. These animal experiments show that laboratory animals don't be respected. The rights of animals as well as human rights should be respected. So, Most animals should not suffer from not only mental anguish but also physical distress during testing any more because experimental animals are living creatures and should be respected.
 
  Next, Animal testing doesn't work. Some people think that animal testing is most accurate and reliable method because animals share many genes with humans. However, animals is not little human. They can be a human and human also can be animal. So, they cannot get human diseases. For example, Chimpanzees, animals with whom we share more than 98% of our DNA, don’t suffer from fatal forms of AIDS, hepatitis B or common malaria diseases which kill millions of people every year. So, They can make poor data because animal testing cannot reflect human condition perfectly. The best-known example is thalidomide, used in the 1950s as a sedative and prescribed to treat morning sickness in pregnant women. Thalidomide was safe when tested in animals, but when used by mothers-to-be, led to birth defects in over 10,000 children. Moreover, Animal testing showed that penicillin was ineffective at treating infected rabbits (and was actually toxic to guinea pigs), yet later it proved safe and effective for treating bacterial infections in most humans. The animal experiments often show unreliable and unaccurate results. If use of animals on experiment continues, It can be a disaster to human because unreliable and unaccurate data can hurt a lot of people. So If real purpose of experiments is finding treatment for many disease and curing the human, we should not test on animals because animal experiment doesn't work.
    
  Finally, There are various alternatives to animal testing. Nowadays, Many experts have stated to find alternatives that are appropriate to human because animal testing is cruel and unreliable. The alternatives that experts find are now more effective and accurate rather than animal testing. Also, they have a lot of good points. These alternatives to animal testing include that complicated experiments using human cells and tissues, advanced computer-modeling techniques and studies with human volunteers. For example, Harvard’s Wyss Institute has created “organs-on-chips” that contain human cells grown in a state-of-the-art system to mimic the structure and function of human organs and organ systems. The chips can be used instead of animals in disease research, drug testing, and toxicity testing and have been shown to replicate human physiology, diseases, and drug responses more accurately than crude animal experiments do. These alternatives makes results that are actually relevant to human bodies. Also, non-animal testing has a lot of benefits. For examples, Non-animal tests are more cost-effective and practical. The traditional testing of chemicals using animals can take up to five years per substance and cost millions of dollars, while non-animal alternatives can test hundreds of chemicals in a week for a fraction of the cost. In sum, non-animal testing is more cost-effective and reliable while, animal experiments are unreliable and cruel. If we have more effective method, we don't have to experiment on animals.
 
  some people can argue that animal testing is most accurate method because humans share most genes with mammals. However, opponent's opinion is overlooking that animal testing cannot help people find human diseases because animals never reflect human bodies perfectly. So, medicine that is effective in animals may be ineffective in human bodies. Even, animal experiments lead to serious problem to human health. One of the best examples of this occurred when monkeys treated with a therapeutic antibody (anti-CD28 monoclonal antibody TGN1412) did not predict the potentially fatal immune response that was triggered in humans. Also, It’s hardly surprising that the success rate for predicting harmful side effects from animal experiments is only 5-25%. So, animal testing is not accurate and reliable method because although they share a lot of genes with humans, animals testing can make poor data that have a bad effect on human beings.
  Also someone can say that It is very dangerous for humans to give a medicine that are not tested on animals directly. But It is not important because there are various alternative to animal testing. One of examples is advanced computer Modeling. It show that these models can accurately predict the ways that new drugs will react in the human body and replace the use of animals in exploratory research and many standard drug tests. we don't argue that we should give medicine to human without any testing such as animal testing. we can ensure that these products are safe through various alternatives that are more effective rather than animal testing.
 
  A responsible society should not allow experimenters to test using animals. First, animal testing is cruel and makes experimental animals suffer from severe pain. Next, animal testing doesn't work because animals never can reflect human bodies perfectly. Finally, There are various alternatives that are more reliable and effective rather than animal testing. 
  A controversy about animal testing occur when the animal experiment video show that many animals suffer from this testing. It is important for not only human beings but also animals to stop the animal testing because animals are living creature and should be respected. So, Stopping animal testing is best solution because animal testing can not only hurt experimental animals but also make poor data that hurt people. The Director of the National Institutes of Health, Dr. Francis Collins, recognized that “the use of animal models for therapeutic development and target validation is time consuming, costly, and may not accurately predict efficacy in humans.” If we don't stop the animal testing that cause serious problem to human health because people believe that animal experiment is effective way, we someday suffer from consequence of animal testing. Who will prevent this situation? It will be you and me. So, In order to prevent this situation, It is necessary to stop animal testing.
 

Conclusion

My Conclusion 1
 
We should not experiment on animals because, First, animal testing is cruel and makes experimental animals suffer from severe pain. Next, animal testing doesn't work because animals never can reflect human bodies perfectly. Finally, There are various alternatives that are more reliable and effective rather than animal testing.
 
The Director of the National Institutes of Health, Dr. Francis Collins, recognized that “the use of animal models for therapeutic development and target validation is time consuming, costly, and may not accurately predict efficacy in humans.” If we don't stop the animal testing because people believe that animal experiment is effective way, we someday suffer from consequence of animal testing. So, we should not experiment on animals.
 
 
My Conclusion 2
 
A responsible society should not allow experimenters to test using animals. First, animal testing is cruel and makes experimental animals suffer from severe pain. Next, animal testing doesn't work because animals never can reflect human bodies perfectly. Finally, There are various alternatives that are more reliable and effective rather than animal testing.  
 
A controversy about animal testing occur when the animal experiment video show that many animals suffer from this testing. It is important for not only human beings but also animals to stop the animal testing because animals are living creature and should be respected. So, Stopping animal testing is best solution because animal testing can not only hurt experimental animals but also make poor data that hurt people. The Director of the National Institutes of Health, Dr. Francis Collins, recognized that “the use of animal models for therapeutic development and target validation is time consuming, costly, and may not accurately predict efficacy in humans.” If we don't stop the animal testing that cause serious problem to human health because people believe that animal experiment is effective way, we someday suffer from consequence of animal testing. Who will prevent this situation? It will be you and me. So, In order to prevent this situation, It is necessary to stop animal testing.

 

refutation and concession

1. What is my thesis?
 
we should not experiment on animals.
  
2. What is the opposite position?
  
we should experiment using animals.
  
3. What arguments can I anticipate?
  
a) Animal testing is most accurate method because humans share many genes with animals.
  
b) It is very dangerous for humans to give a medicine that are not tested on animals directly.
  
4. How will I counter those arguments
  
a) animal testing cannot help people find human diseases because animals never reflect human bodies perfectly. (example - anti-CD28 monoclonal antibody TGN1412)
  
b) There are various alternatives to animal testing. (example - advanced computer Modeling)
 
  
some people can argue that animal testing is most accurate method because humans share most genes with mammals. However, opponent's opinion is overlooking that animal testing cannot help people find human diseases because animals never reflect human bodies perfectly. So, medicine that is effective in animals may be ineffective in human bodies. Even, animal experiments lead to serious problem to human health. One of the best examples of this occurred when monkeys treated with a therapeutic antibody (anti-CD28 monoclonal antibody TGN1412) did not predict the potentially fatal immune response that was triggered in humans. Also, It’s hardly surprising that the success rate for predicting harmful side effects from animal experiments is only 5-25%. So, animal testing is not accurate and reliable method because although they share a lot of genes with humans, animals testing can make poor data that have a bad effect on human beings.
  
Also someone can say that It is very dangerous for humans to give a medicine that are not tested on animals directly. But It is not important because there are various alternative to animal testing. One of examples is advanced computer Modeling. It show that these models can accurately predict the ways that new drugs will react in the human body and replace the use of animals in exploratory research and many standard drug tests. we don't argue that we should give medicine to human without any testing such as animal testing. we can ensure that these products are safe through various alternatives that are more effective rather than animal testing.
 
 
 
 
 

The Confirmation

because nobody especially cares, and it is an opinion most people would not disagree with)
1. What is my thesis?


we should not experiment on animals.

 2. What types of source am I using to defend my thesis? 
I am using statistics, result of studies and article.

 3. Are my arguments mostly based on evidence, logic or emotion?
 I think that there are no argument that is based on emotion. My arguments are mostly based on evidence because I will mostly use result of study and statistics.



First of all, animal testing reveals cruelty and hurts experimental animals. Some people believe that experimental animals died without pain during testing. But, If we see animal testing process, we cannot say it. The animal testing process shows that seriousness and cruelty of animal experiments. For example, In research and testing, animals are subjected to experiments that can include everything from testing new drugs to infecting with diseases, poisoning for toxicity testing, burning skin, causing brain damage, implanting electrodes into the brain, maiming, blinding, and other painful and invasive procedures. Also, Anesthetization, intubation, and euthanasia are also common lab procedures which require extensive training and skill. When improperly performed, these procedures cause extreme pain and discomfort. Like this, Many experimental animals suffer from physical distress during testing. Besides, They suffer from mental anguish. For example, Many animal experiments utilize restraining devices, designed to prevent an animal from moving. Also, Animals in labs suffer severe stress from day-to-day laboratory life. They spend their lives in barren cages, unable to make choices or express natural behaviors. Most never experience fresh air or sunshine, only bars and concrete. They show abnormal behavior because of poor environment. These animal experiments show that laboratory animals don't be respected. The rights of animals as well as human rights should be respected. So, Most animals should not suffer from not only mental anguish but also physical distress during testing any more because experimental animals are living creatures and should be respected.
 
Next, Animal testing doesn't work. Some people think that animal testing is most accurate and reliable method because animals share many genes with humans. However, animals is not little human. They can be a human and human also can be animal. So, they cannot get human diseases. For example, Chimpanzees, animals with whom we share more than 98% of our DNA, don’t suffer from fatal forms of AIDS, hepatitis B or common malaria diseases which kill millions of people every year. So, They can make poor data because animal testing cannot reflect human condition perfectly. The best-known example is thalidomide, used in the 1950s as a sedative and prescribed to treat morning sickness in pregnant women. Thalidomide was safe when tested in animals, but when used by mothers-to-be, led to birth defects in over 10,000 children. Moreover, Animal testing showed that penicillin was ineffective at treating infected rabbits (and was actually toxic to guinea pigs), yet later it proved safe and effective for treating bacterial infections in most humans. The animal experiments often show unreliable and unaccurate results. If use of animals on experiment continues, It can be a disaster to human because unreliable and unaccurate data can hurt a lot of people. So If real purpose of experiments is finding treatment for many disease and curing the human, we should not test on animals because animal experiment doesn't work.
 
Finally, There are various alternatives to animal testing. Nowadays, Many experts have stated to find alternatives that are appropriate to human because animal testing is cruel and unreliable. The alternatives that experts find are now more effective and accurate rather than animal testing. Also, they have a lot of good points. These alternatives to animal testing include that complicated experiments using human cells and tissues, advanced computer-modeling techniques and studies with human volunteers. For example, Harvard’s Wyss Institute has created “organs-on-chips” that contain human cells grown in a state-of-the-art system to mimic the structure and function of human organs and organ systems. The chips can be used instead of animals in disease research, drug testing, and toxicity testing and have been shown to replicate human physiology, diseases, and drug responses more accurately than crude animal experiments do. These alternatives makes results that are actually relevant to human bodies. Also, non-animal testing has a lot of benefits. For examples, Non-animal tests are more cost-effective and practical. The traditional testing of chemicals using animals can take up to five years per substance and cost millions of dollars, while non-animal alternatives can test hundreds of chemicals in a week for a fraction of the cost. In sum, non-animal testing is more cost-effective and reliable while, animal experiments are unreliable and cruel. If we have more effective method, we don't have to experiment on animals.
 

narration

1. What do people already know about my topic?

People already know that a lot of products that many people use in daily life go   through   animal testing to ensure the products are safe.

2 .What research has already been done about my topic?

a) cruetly and seriousness of animal testing
http://www.neavs.org/research/harm-suffering
b) reson why animal testing doesn't work.
http://www.animalaid.org.uk/h/n/YOUTH/experiments//1873//
c) alternatives to animal testing.
http://www.peta.org/issues/animals-used-for-experimentation/alternatives-animal-testing/

3. What are the implications of my argument (What if I'm right? What if I'm right and people ignore me?)

Animal testing obviously has a negative influence on human beings. Although some people believe that animal testing has led to significant advance on medical science, Animal testing is not reliable way.


Animal testing is any experiment using living animals in order to develop for scientific aim such as medicine, food or cosmetics. The various animals - from a protozoan to mammal - are used commonly in animal testing. In 2012, animals that are used for scientific experiment are approximately 500,000,0000 each year in the world. The origin of animal testing trace back to the ancient Greece. Hippocrates(BC460?~BC377?) explained reproduction and heredity through animal dissection. And Aristoteles(BC384~BC322) also developed anatomy and embryology through observing animal. Moreover, Claudios Galenos(129~199) who was roman physician in second century is famous because he investigated fact about brain nerves, muscle, bone and heart ,dissecting animals like monkey, pigs and goats. Like this, Study of animal dissection was important groundwork in medical areas. Although animal testing has led to advances in medical science, why people raise their voice against animal testing? Recently, animals experimentation video reveals that experimental animals that cannot move at all in plastic machines suffer from drugs tests. Although It is difficult to stop animal testing completely because Animal testing's purpose and form is various as the long history, people argue that animal testing should stop.

first draft introduction

Many people use a lot of products in daily life. For example, you use some cosmetics for your dating. And If you catch a cold because you stay at home and turn on an air conditioner, you have medicine that doctor prescribed. Also, you have a meal when you are hungry. Most people use products without doubt because they believe that products are safe. So, What kind of process do these products go through in order to ensure these products are safe? They are tested through animal testing! Many companies experiment on animals to make safe products. But, use of animal in experiments cause controversy. There are some people who argue that animal testing is most effective and accurate method to develop medicine. On the other hands, there are some people who argue that we should not use animals on experiments because animal testing has cruelty and unreliable method. In such controversy, It seems like facts that we should not experiment on animal.

classical argument outline

1. The introduction, which warms up the audience, establishes goodwill and rapport with the readers, and announces the general theme or thesis of the argument.
I will start by describing the situation everyone use products that are tested through animal testing in daily life : cosmetics, medicine and food. This will be connected to animal testing. Then I will shift attention to process to make these products safe. I will end with my thesis, "we should not experiment on animals."
2. The narration, which summarizes relevant background material, provides any information the audience needs to know about the environment and circumstances that produce the argument, and set up the stakes-what’s at risk in this question. In academic writing, this often takes the form of a literature review.
I will summarize information about animal testing - definition, typical experimental animals and the number of experimental animals. And, I will give a brief history of animal testing through Hippocrates, Aristoteles and Andreas Vesalius to help audiences understand advances in medicine. Also, I will explain environment that makes people think animal testing should stop.
3. The confirmation,which lays out in a logical order (usually strongest to weakest or most obvious to most subtle) the claims that support the thesis, providing evidence for each claim.
I will start by a logical reason why I have this opinion and there are supporting examples.
a) seriousness and cruelty of animal testing.
b) why animal testing doesn't work.(+ non-animal testing's good points)
c) a lot of alternatives to animal testing.
4. The refutation and concession, which looks at opposing viewpoints to the writer’s claims, anticipating objections from the audience, and allowing as much of the opposing viewpoints as possible without weakening the thesis.
I will make two of anticipated opposite opinions :
a) Animal testing is most accurate method because humans share many genes with animals. But a lot of examples proved that It is not reliable because animal testing cannot never predict human condition perfectly.
b) It is very dangerous for humans to give a medicine that are not tested on animals directly. But It doesn't matter because there are various alternatives to develop medicine.
 
5. The summation, which provides a strong conclusion, amplifying the force of the argument, and showing the readers that this solution is the best at meeting the circumstances.
I will close with a summary of my previous points and reasons (cruelty of animal testing, ineffectiveness of animal testing, alternatives to animal testing.) and I quote the expert's saying. Also, I will end with emphasizing my thesis : we should stop experimenting on animals.